Thoughts & Essays
A Search Result You Never Want to See
Generally, when we conduct an online search for a person – whether we are researching someone of world renown, a specialist in our industry, or a friend we haven’t spoken to in a long time and whose numbers don’t work anymore – we are used to seeing LinkedIn, Wikipedia or Facebook page references to them as our first results. Perhaps articles they have written, or their own site that we didn’t know they’d published.
It’s also my job to place clients’ sites at the top of search engine rankings.
Today I found an old friend’s obituary there.
I then proceeded to spend the next 2 hours trying to prove that little excerpt wrong until I found a news item relating to her passing, and I was forced to accept the painful reality. She was 32.
‘Gutted’ and ‘shocked’ would be a good start to describe my initial spine-chilled reactions.
This is not going to be a long-winded discussion on how short life is, and what we make of it. It’s simply a reflection on how sometimes we find things we would never expect (or like) on what we have come to take for granted as a primary source of instant information gratification, and the horrifying news it can provide on such a personal level.
Panta rei, amiga mia. Descansa en paz.
Wanted: i-Balance
It feels as though humanity is going through a rather confusing phase. Watching several video parodies of the latest Apple iPad has prompted me to look back on some of our achievements.
Back in the 4th millennium B.C., our ancestors wrote on clay tablets, making greater use of their brains to retain what was being instructed. Eventually we upgraded to quills and pens and leather-bound notebooks. Now we have magically come ‘full circle’ with cute touch-screen offspring that allow us to wirelessly access vast sources of information, without having to write anything down; worst of all, without having to memorise it. This has become our latest human development in brain function – coordinating our interactions on screen to conjure up a ludicrous amount of data we are hardly capacitated to remember these days. We are left wanting for more and dangerously retaining less.
Unfortunately, Generation Y seems to be in truth a Generation ADD or even ADHD, considering the constant bombardment of news, information, and distractions that seem so important to us now. Many people wouldn’t even realise how limited their attention span is as they are too busy skimming from one thing to the next – in fact, this trait seems to be a given these days.
Likewise, few of those living in the developed countries would know to tell which phase the moon is in to understand their heightened sensitivities, or find their bearings at night based on the stars. We are so married to our gadgets and internet that we have forgotten the most basic elements of survival. It is frightening, to say the least, given the geographical turmoil we are all experiencing in different parts of the world. Not to put apocalyptic fears into anyone’s heads, yet the reality is such that so many people are ill-prepared for even reading their location in a new city, without some artefact to show them colourful lines on a virtual map to get from point to point (“Turn left at the next corner. Drive a hundred meters. Turn right. Turn right. You missed it…”).
We think we have reduced the clutter by putting all our books and music into a little pocketsize hard drive with a fancy screen, and yet we panic if that expensive toy gets broken. The stress levels can be more dramatic than losing a shipment of boxes containing the same items in their original format. Just like squirrels, we have a deeply rooted habit of hoarding.
Cut.
Pan to the right side of the brain…
Picture a lush garden with waterfalls and a soft breeze tickling the tree branches. There might be squirrels.
Cue the Zen approach to life…
Whilst it seems we are increasingly drawn towards subliminal slavery to technology, we are also learning to make great use of it. Now you can sit on a bus and read up on the latest nutritional benefits of quinoa, or listen to podcasts of your preferred spiritual mentor.
A lot of us crave a more meaningful existence. Daring to explore our inner callings, decompose anxieties, break destructive patterns, understand what it really means to be human.
Not everyone is going to take off on a weekend yoga retreat, where you can make a more concentrated effort on healing body, mind and soul. I have tried this and quite enjoyed it… admittedly being yoga’d out by the third and final day (hey, it was my first time). I even took my iPod and laptop so I could get some quality writing done between sessions, and found that I never touched one or the other, choosing instead to pull out a book and read it in charming outdoor silence, with hints of a few birds possibly discussing lunch plans.
It would seem these attitudes are at opposite ends of our existential spectrum, yet there is a growing number of people who are sitting somewhere in the middle… technological advances on one hand, determination to maintain all-round balance in their lives on the other.
So, whilst I am hopeful of our natural instinct to nourish spiritual endeavours, embrace deeper relationships with one another, and harbour a more holistic approach towards our personal development… I do of course love a cute gadget that will give me a friendly reminder to step away from the computer, pick up my fountain pen to go write in the sun, and call to wish you a happy birthday. Not to mention play my favourite tunes as I’m walking towards the coffee shop.
The technology around us is advancing at the speed of procreating rabbits, and yet humankind itself can get lazy and lost in this myriad of gadgetry, thinking we are evolving through it as a species.
Therefore, I would encourage you to ask yourself if all those fancy little toys are truly enabling a more relaxed, meaningful, clutter-free lifestyle, or if they are inadvertently causing more stress than you originally anticipated. Are they truly helping you enhance as a person, or stupefying you? True balance comes from internal focus, not from shiny little objects…
The Canvas, And What You Do With It
When we were kids, we thrived on getting a new blank canvas to start painting on. Or a new notebook. A new puzzle to put together. A fountain pen. A trip to the park. A visit from Grandma. Learning to make pancakes. There was always something to look forward to, and everything seemed easy. Even if it presented some sort of challenge – we were certainly up for it, with open hearts and open minds.
So why have we turned our backs on our innate ability to look a challenge in the eyes and say, “I can do this”?
It seems so much time and energy gets misdirected on talking about our problems, instead of actually resolving them. Too many people thrive on this, and it’s a shame. And yet it can be very easy to get caught up in that dynamic when surrounded by others who mostly discuss their issues with no real focus on how to resolve them. In fact, I wonder what the carbon footprint is for talking crap these days – I’m sure the results would be shocking.
When I try to explain to some people how even the words we use can affect the outcome of our intentions, they look at me with evident confusion and doubt. They cannot envision how saying, “I want peace,” is better than “I don’t want drama,” because somehow to them, “I don’t want drama,” implies that they want peace – yet, that is not what they are saying. With so many people talking this same ‘language’ it is no wonder that things tend to work out less favourably.
The energy we share is akin to the way we breathe. If we sit huddled over ourselves all day, our ability to breathe becomes limited, and we feel less motivated, less interested. Yet if we pull our shoulders back and breathe in a healthy lungful of air, our attitude changes; so too does the flow of things around us. Go on, try it.
When people say ignorance is bliss, it truly can be… as long as we are not living in denial of our responsibilities, and by responsibilities, I mean with ourselves. It is also very easy to shift our focus towards external demands as opposed to internal necessities, and the danger lies in letting these so-called responsibilities dictate our lives, putting up walls of excuses between our inner inspiration and the passion to make things happen.
I can say hand on heart that this past year has been my most challenging so far, on many levels. Whilst I am grateful for the love, support and friendships that I have been blessed with in this time, there has been a lot of struggle to overcome obstacles, reach new levels of understanding, and generally remember that choices made are neither good nor bad, merely lessons to move along the path of life, even if we hurt or get hurt.
I have joked in recent months that my learning curve has been so steep I needed grappling hooks. Since I’ve always loved the idea of climbing mountains, the analogy seems fitting.
And that is what I am used to – making things happen and ‘climbing mountains’. Scaling new rocks and reaching the pinnacle, only to look back and remind myself of where I have come from, how far, and how much I have achieved. It is amazing, even with the hardships. I encourage you to do the same for yourself.
Wherever you are, take a few minutes to look back, thank and forgive others for what you have experienced with them. Most importantly, thank and forgive yourself. Remember that while so many other people’s lives have been literally destroyed by physical earthquakes, it is amazing to be alive, breathing, whole, here, and now. Even if you’re not quite where you’d rather be, you’re probably where you’re meant to be. If your best friend managed to finish the triathlon and you’re still on the treadmill building up stamina, it’s alright. You’ll get there when it’s time.
Tomorrow it may stop raining, you may have more money in your pocket, you may find the person you will spend the rest of your life with. But remember within all of that, it is you who makes your life what it is. You who choose to be happy, you who choose to aspire to a better self, you who share the wealth of your soul with others, you who go to sleep with your thoughts regardless of who might lie beside you.
And when you wake up in the morning, welcome yourself back to this existence. Whatever direction you take in life, you can change your mind at any time, but always try to change it for the better, even when faced with adversity from others (they won’t always understand you). Allow yourself the freedom to pick up a new canvas in life, large or small, and embrace the possibilities of what you can do with it. After all, what do the first three letters of the word ‘canvas’ tell you?
On that note, better get some more chalk…
Amazing – Seal (watch the video)
Everyone says you’re amazing
You say you don’t know, how to do it now,
So you run,
It’s not that you’re bleeding, but you through it now,
So you run, so you run,
I know that you need it, you can’t live alone,
So you run, so you run…
Everyone says you’re amazing
Now that you’re clean
Only you know who the real one are, cause you’ve seen
There is only one question I want to ask, is it healing when you’re here
Everyone see you’re amazing
Does anyone ask you?
If you cry in your sleep and do you feel okay
When you run,
Thinking its doomsday, you got to let it go,
So you run, so you run…
Pretend you don’t see it, that way we can live the lie, when you run…
So you run..
Everyone says you’re amazing
Now that you’re clean
Only you know who the real one are, cause you’ve seen
There is only one question I want to ask, is it healing when, when you’re hear
Everyone see you’re amazing
Does anyone ask you…?
Cause I know that you real, amazing, amazing, amazing…
Everyone says you’re amazing
Now that you’re clean
Only you know who the real ones are, because you’ve seen
There is only one question I want to ask, is it healing when you’re hear
Everyone sees you’re amazing
Everyone says amazing
You’re amazing
(I want you to always feel amazing)
You’re amazing
(I want you to always feel amazing)
You’re amazing
